Slow Day, Slow Week

Not much going on…I’ve been wanting to write about Jessica Simpson for a while but unfortunately she’s just pretty darn boring…

I persaonally love Jess.  She’s totally hot, even though she may not be in her Dukes of Hazard body days, she’s still pretty smokin...Oh, and I love her shoe line. 

But I know this look well…because this is my look…It’s called: I have thin legs, but everything else jiggles and is out of shape so I’ll just wear short shorts with cute shoes and baggy tops to mask what’s really going on.

 

These shoes below are actually pretty ugly and those legs are pretty white.…looks similar to my outfit last night.

 

Lookin good here…short jean shorts again, cute white flowy top with white blazer- definitely hiding any jiggle that might be going on.  I like it.  Oh and her man is borrowning her shirt, very cute.

This one is different with the short red shorts…mixing it up.

 

 

 

 

Unfortunately that’s pretty much all that’s interesting going on with Jess…if you can even call this interesting.  Oh I heard something about her post-poning her wedding.  Awesome... just let us know when it airs, the suspense is killing me!

 

Now here’s something interesting…God, I don’t even know what to say about this other than WHY???  For those of you who don't recogize her, this is our most recent Bachelorette- Ashley Herbert.  And for those of you who don't watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette, this is the woman in which 25 men are supposed to be fighting over.  I know what you're thinking, and No, the show does not take place in prison.

Ah, here we go, more interesting gossip…Holly Madison Insures Her Breasts for $1 Million. 

 How does this stuff get published?

Sorry folks, we need some scandal.  And I’m certainly not writing about Ashton and Demi until something real happens, which likely won’t happen- those two love each other.  Such BS- when are they going to break up so he can date someone young and hot, like Blake Lively?

Exclusive: Spencer Pratt Is Broke, Can't Get Work

All I have to say about this is THANK GOD, it’s about time!  I have been waiting for this day since he was on that stupid reality TV show where they put all those D-List Celebrities out in the jungle.  F!  That reality show was the worst; I’m hoping none of you actually remember what I’m talking about.

OH, except when Sanjaya was kicking ass at competitions…for some reason that really amused me to see this borderline homosexual boy let tarantulas crawl all over him and just chill through it.  (For those of you who don’t remember Sanjaya, he was the Indian boy on American Idol with the hair).   

Anyway, back to my point… I remember Spencer getting P/O’d and saying something like “I’m too rich and too famous to be dealing with this.”   Pfft- I’ll kill him- what a shit head.

Spencer, I will give you minimal credit for managing to get sort of famous and make some money by doing nothing expect pose for paparazzi and hope it gets published.  I am a big fan of reality TV and reality stars, (obvi, I’m trying to be one myself) but there’s something crucial that you have not realized…You need to have SOMETHING to keep people interested.  Examples of “SOMETHING” that might keep people interested could be: Personality, Fail, Good Looks, Fail, Any kind of talent, Fail, Intelligence, Fail, Sense of Humor, Fail, Charitable/Humanitarian, Fail, Enough money to buy publicity, i.e. The Kardashians, Fail.  Spenc, the only thing you have going for you right now is my blog and I really don’t think you’ll get far with my 7 followers. 

While we’re talking about Reality Stars, I’d like to point out that it’s no surprise that rumors have started about Kristin Cavallari and Mark Ballas.  Sorry ladies who like him; there’s no denying that he can move which is generally sexy, but he’s a serial dater and he’s not cute. 

Kristin, believe it or not, you are too good for him.  You don’t go from NFL quarterback to DWTS professional.  I know Jay Cutler isn’t exactly cream of the crop when it comes to NFL QB’s, but I’m thinking you could get someone a little more impressive than Mark Ballas.  Gross.

Football!

HeII ya football! 

 I still don’t understand why there are chicks out there that don’t like football????  So confused??

·         One- You get to dress up EVERY WEEK and put on anything you want…that includes, hooker boots, shorts skirts OR short shorts (my fav), belly shirts, shirts with your boobs hanging out, tons of make-up, crazy hats, accessories galore…the list goes on! 

·         2- Single ladies…I just can’t figure out how you sit around every day and wonder how/why you are still single, yet, you refuse to embrace football!  What?? Weird.

Let’s recap: One- Dress up, 2- Men love it. 

·         Third- you get to booze on Sundays…need I say more??? 

I will say more…

·       Michael Vick: Dirtball- talented, but Dirtball- Thumbs down

·       Hines Ward: Awesome but plays for Pittsburgh- Thumbs down

·       Anyone who plays for Baltimore: Terrible- Thumbs down

·       Aaron Rodgers: Superstar (for now) - Thumbs up

·       Terrelle Pryor: Likely to be in jail any day now- Thumbs downs

·       Any NFL Kicker: Almost never gets hurt, doesn’t have to do much, although has a ton of pressure when the time comes: Thumbs up!

·       Tom Brady: Over him, but he kills it: Thumbs up

·       Adrian Peterson: Hot, and talented: Thumbs up

·       Chad Ocho Cinco, or whatever his name is now: stupid- but attractive, annoying, but a great dancer: Thumbs up

·       Peyton Manning: OUT- sorry folks, he’s done for the season…still he’s the bomb: Thumbs up

·       Colt McCoy- I love him: Thumbs up!

                                                In conclusion: Go Browns!

                         Yes folks, that's me- as if you don't know- I only have 7 followers.

Inspiration- J Lo

Has anyone yet seen J Lo’s new Fiat car commercial?? If not, you are in for a treat!

Look at her move!  Those background dancers are hot!  Is that news paper she's crushing in the street?  Crush it girl!

I will admit, when J Lo joined the cast of American Idol and was suddenly in the spot light again, I was impressed by her hotness…she’s hot.  She’s forty-something (42  I think) and looks amazing, and anyone who disagrees just can’t see past the new Fiat commercial…not that I can blame you! (What the heII is a Fiat anyway?  Should I know?)

Jen…it’s starting to get embarrassing.  You’re back, you’re hot, then all of a sudden, you’re performing again like Britney Spears at 16, then you’re divorcing Marc Anthony (it’s about time, he is nasty), and you’re everywhere prancing around like you did back in your Ben Affleck days, on the yacht where he’s rubbing you’re a$$.  Come on Jen, those days are over!  Ben is gone!  We all know Marc Anthony was a mistake, but it’s too late!  You are not a Pop Princess anymore!  Just retire like Paula Abdul, and host your reality TV shows, and let the Nicole Scherzinger’s of the world do their prancing.   

This chick LOVES herself…

                                                                  Peace out b!tches

God I’m hot, take that!